Runners for Hire

On Sunday 29 May 2005, the Star newspaper headlines showed four guys running on a busy road with one of them holding a bunch of flowers. The photo was well taken as the camera angle was lowered to emphasize the runners in high running action and to show contrast, the fleet of vehicles behind them was blurred in vision. That really caught my attention.

One of the runners was actually the groom. Accompanied by three best men, the groom was actually running 8km to the bride’s home to get married. As reported, the mother-in-law was most impressed seeing them completely drenched upon reaching her house with this unique way of getting married.

I think it was a creative idea and something new to do a 8-km run on the wedding day. I think it is also a fantastic idea that the Magnificient Seven Penguin/Sunshine Runners can also do a similar good job. Instead of doing only 8km, the Penguin/Sunshine runners would probably run extra miles to do a 18-km (sound similar to "sure prosperous wan" in Cantonese). I am sure other than the mother-in-law, more people would be impressed.

Instead of the reported "... getting ready to run at the crack of dawn", the Penguin/Sunshine runners would do it slighter later. "... as the blue skies welcome a radiant orange sunrise" (since we are of full marathon status; we can run faster and thus requires shorter time). Besides, as the name “Sunshine” goes, we function best when the sun comes out.

The running method is only practical for distance less than 10km. For distance, say, exceeding 50km, we need to engage those ultra-marathon runners as marathon runners only run 42 km. However, we do not have many marathon runners here let alone looking for ultra-marathon runners.

It would be too messy on that auspicious day for long-haul running even though we can run. We do not want to tire the groom as he has a host of important activities to perform from dawn till dusk, especially the tasks at night. As such, if the bride's house is, say, 30km away, I would suggest engaging those Pacesetters or Penguins/Sunshine who have done Duathlon races before. The MMDS series of Duathlon races would be excellence testing grounds.

The plan: Use road racing bicycles instead of the luxurious Mercedes-Benz. I think no one has done using racing bicycles before (not that I know) to get married.

The formation: All those that accompany the groom – and including the groom – are on racing bicycles. Leading the pack would be our macho guy, Tony (Penguin-3). On the left of the groom would be Meng (Penguin-2), on the right would be Eric Teo (Penguin-10), and I would be trailing behind the groom – in a diamond shape formation where the groom is well protected. At this moment, Chee Wee (Penguin-11) would probably have to assume the role as Event Manager as he is still looking around for a suitable racing bicycle.

The travels: Behind the diamond formation is a group of Duathlethes. Preferable nine of them – three in each row for three rows – as number nine in Cantonese signify longevity. So, in this scenario, we have “sure auspicious wan” and “sure long life wan” – that was really good feng shui for the marriage.

In order to attract attention from the pedestrians and motorists, I would suggest tying a 28 empty 100Plus cans to the groom's bicycle, something similar to those "Just Married" type. Since runners and Duathletes are inseparable with 100Plus drinks, the number is also very auspicious. We wish that the newlyweds would live up to “100 plus” years too – Yeah, another fantastic feng shui.

Depending on the noise level produced from the empty cans, I probably have to put on ear-plugs. Since continuous exposure to sound above 80 decibels could be harmful, I could be the one getting the maximum impact.

If you are interested, please send your emails detailing the necessary requirements to the Sunshine Runners for consideration. The email address is found on the left sidebar of this weblog -- just click it. Our Event Manager would get in-touch with you for detailed discussion.

Just Joking,
By KC ... :-)