From the Plains of Greece

Note by KC: For those who have not run a marathon before, do you know what is the actual distance? I have had a rude awakening when one of my lady colleagues thought that the distance of a marathon is only 10 kilometers (6 miles) due to the misleading banners that promote 10km runs locally. But for those who have run numerous marathons, I believe you could even get it right in your dreams.

The story below narrates humorously the origin and how the distance was computed – something like history lesson amid modern running. Note: 1 mile is 1.6 kilometers. Read on and be amused …

Text is extracted from the book “I Run, Therefore I am – Nuts!” by Bob Schwartz

Many of us know what it's like to run a marathon, not all of us know the history behind it. Perhaps you know that it has something to with a Greek battle, but maybe for all you know it might have been Phi Kappa Delta versus Sigma Nu. Well, I'm here to change all that. I'm the history professor in the micro fleece tights and the reflective pullover. Let's begin today's lesson.

Legend has it that the first famous long-distance runner (well be­fore endorsement deals with shoe companies and guaranteed race-appearance fees) emerged from the plains of Marathon, Greece, in 490 b.c.

After the Athenians had defeated the Persians at the Battle of Mara­thon (which has a better ring than, say, the Battle of Dhidhimotikhonopolis—you'd be hard pressed to get that on a race T-shirt), the Greek warrior Pheidippides was chosen to bring the news of the great victory to the citizens of Athens. Problem was, the city was many, many miles off in the distance and the invention of the automobile or any form of mass transit was still a few years away.

So, young Pheidippides began running the approximately 26 miles from Marathon to Athens without the advantage of a big, carbo-loading pasta dinner the night before. He also ran without the ben­efit of aid stations, course volunteers, energy bars, bands playing music, or cheering spectators yelling, "You're looking great!" He also did not have the advantages of air-cushioned shoes, polyester shorts, or race directors at the finish line saying, "Here comes Mr. Pheidippides from Athens. Occupation is courier. Let's give him a nice round of I applause!"

Pheidippides also fell victim to a common training blunder of modern runners. Apparently he'd recently completed, in two days, a little jaunt of 150 miles to Sparta from Marathon in the effort to obtain some military assistance. Clearly, he'd failed to read the overtraining section from Herodotus' Book on Running, or he was simply trying to set a PR (personal record) for a weekly mileage total.

Fact is, because of his recent ultra-event and his ongoing day job of warrior, he didn't allow himself sufficient rest before having to embark on his own marathon. (Of course, he had the better excuse of not actually knowing someone had pre-registered him for the race.) He hit the proverbial wall around the large sign that read, six miles to Athens, and, tragically, he succumbed to exhaustion on the out­skirts of the city.

But all was not entirely lost as, in his last gasping and panting breath, he heroically uttered those final words of, "Rejoice, we con­quer! Got any sports drink?"

Tragically, it was then that the rigors of the marathon conquered him. For his tremendous effort he would become famous throughout the land. (Truth be known, Greek rumor has it that Pheidippides ran much farther than was necessary. Seems he got turned around slightly, and despite not having the benefit of an AAA TripTik, he chose to be the initiator of that time-honored male tradition – refusing to ask for directions. Then again, what challenges would a marathon be if Athens were really only 7.5 miles away?)

His legacy spawned the inclusion of the marathon race when the Olympics were inaugurated in Greece in 1896. Unfortunately none of the 25 entrants seemed to have gained any lesson from the calamitous outcome of Pheidippides. The runners had pretty much no idea of what they were about to experience. a first-time marathoner encumbered with a healthy dose of naiveté is often not an attractive sight.
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The participants all struggled to get to the finish line, and only nine actually completed the race. Due to their fatigue at the end, only four were even able to remember their names, and three of them were delirious enough to jump into the Olympic pool, thinking their next event was synchronized swimming. The good news was, in their derangement, they picked up a bronze medal for their impromptu pool performance.
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As for the gold medalist in the inaugural Olympic marathon, the story is that a local Greek peasant named Spiridon Louis entered the Olympic Stadium first, and slowly ran toward the finish line that was in front of the king’s throne. (However, until I see actual photographs of the finish, I still believe it was a Kenyan that won.) Allegedly, he was covered with dust and running in tattered, bedraggled, worn sandals (state-of-the-art, though). He would cross the finish line in 2 hours, 55 minutes, and 10 seconds for 40K, and his dazed smile was for realizing he'd now qualified for the Boston Marathon.

His life would change forever. Everlasting glory was bestowed on him (once he passed the rigorous drug-screening laboratory) as the host country went ecstatic. He was given 25,000 francs (perhaps thereby becoming the first athlete to lose his amateur status), and he was finally given permission by his future father-in-law to marry his longtime sweetheart (purportedly a bronze medalist in the badminton competition). Ah, the romance of running.

At the 1908 Olympics in London, the marathon distance was changed from 24.85 to 26 miles, to cover the ground from Windsor Castle to White City Stadium. You may then wonder, where did that lovely 385 yards get tacked on? It was added so that the race could finish in front of King Edward VII’s royal box. Thus, the present distance of 26.2 miles. And many a present-day marathoner wishes Windsor Castle were just a tad bit closer to the king’s box when they find themselves doing the merciless march over the last mile of a marathon.

The Marathon Runners

Note by KC:

Next posting is on Wednesday 29 March evening.

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Here are four hilarious running stories before we take on another marathon challenge on Sunday 26 March at the Sarawak Marathon 2006.

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I find that the story below on Personal Best (PB) was most funny. The PB stuff can not simply be used for any occasion other than running or competitive sports. Otherwise, the consequence could be quite damaging.

I was very concerned with my PB timing when I first started running 10km. But after countless number of runs where my timing was hovering around 50 minutes -- plus-minus three minutes -- I just do not bother about my PB timing anymore.

Another type of runner that really impressed me is The Shuffler runner. It is true that when they run, it is like gliding along but their speed is very fast. My personal experience is that before I could realize, the Shuffler runner is way ahead of me.

Read on and be amused …

Extracted from the book: How to Run a Marathon
By Tony Benyon and Kevin Macey


The Charity Runner

Watching the London Marathon on television, one frequently sees a clown running backwards while tossing a pancake in the air. This apparent lunatic is not plucked from the field by men in white coats because he is running for charity. The aim, more likely than not, is to raise money for some piece of medical apparatus or a new hospital, of which he, if he does not train correctly, will be the main beneficiary.

The majority of these runners indulge in the minimal amount of preparation for their runs. Their efforts appear to be focused on the fancy dress costumes they will wear to hobble in around the course. In most cases these consist of schoolgirl or nurse's uniforms for either women or men.

While watching a race, it is quite common to see grown men dressed as Vikings holding a replica longboat, waiters running with trays full of drinks, Mickey Mouse and even Superman rushing on their way.

As the race progresses highly comical scenes can be witnessed: Vikings riddled with cramp and hardly able to limp let alone loot, pillage and rape; Mickey Mouse slumped on a pavement outside a bar awash with beer; or Superman running into 'the wall' and staggering in anguish as though someone had slipped some Kryptonite into his tights.


The Personal Best

Wearing a shock-proof and water-proof digital watch complete with a lap timer, a stride timer and an inhalation and exhalation timer, the PB takes to the road. A smile curls his top lip when he realises he has reached the first lamp post on his regular training route in a personal best time.

Pounding along the road wearing his 'Sub Four' T-shirt, nothing is capable of breaking his concentration if he thinks a personal best time is possible. Houses may be burning, people may be screaming for help and eccentric millionaires may be giving away bundles of fifty pound notes, yet through it all the PB will not falter in his rhythm.

With his eyes permanently flickering from side to side he boils eggs, mows the lawn and reads newspapers in ceaseless competition with the clock. His manic and exaggerated behaviour has resulted in his marriage breaking down. His wife long since gave up trying to persuade him to aim at endurance records rather than speed records in the matrimonial bed. A breathless 'It was a personal best for me, how was it for you?' is a question she never wants to hear again.

The Iron Man

The Iron Man is so called because of the extreme amount of pain he can take without complaining. If his legs were to be suddenly severed at the knees he would not drop out of a race. He would merely grit his teeth and complete the course still hoping to get near his personal best without making any excuses if he fails to do so.

Dressed in a sweat-soaked running kit complete with head and wrist bands, the Iron Man trains over extreme distances each week. While he is running dogs break their fangs on his calves, mothers pull their children out of his path and badly parked cars are left with dents in the shape of track shoes across their bonnets and roofs.

His unshaven face and the scars on his knees (from countless cartilage operations) give him the appearance of a badly wounded war veteran. The image is further enhanced by the manic staring eyes of a man who has been on one mission too many.

Floods, Arctic conditions, nuclear strikes and the earth tilting on its axis will never stop this man from his regular training runs because the Iron Man can crack walnuts with his eyelids. He works as a cashier in the High Street Bank and answers to the name of Dorian.


The Shuffler

The extraordinary thing about the Shuffler is how he appears not to be running at all and yet completes the marathon consistently in less than three hours. He is in his fifties, bald, wears pebbled glasses and is an engineer. His insignificant appearance makes it all the more galling when he pads silently past you within sight of the finishing line.

While you are riddled with cramp, have hamstring trouble, crave a visit to a toilet or are suffering spasms, the Shuffler glides past you as though he is standing on a pedestrian conveyer belt. No matter by how much you break your personal best, he still breasts the finishing tape before you.

A clue to the Shuffler's success appears to be his leg action or lack of it which has been perfected so as to expend a minimum of energy. His legs never bend at the knee, neither do his feet ever leave the surface of the road by more than half a centimetre. In fact, wet conditions can be a danger to him. He risks losing control by aquaplaning.

If you should wish to run in a similar style to the Shuffler, do not spend money on an expensive pair of designer running shoes; carpet slippers will do just as well.
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Women's Running: Advice That Could Save Your Life (2)

Note: To read Part One, please scroll down to the postings below.

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Text only is extracted from the Runner’s World Book of Running

There are over 600,000 incidents of “violence against the person” reported in the UK every year. Home Office figures produced in 2000 suggest that 167 women are raped in the UK every day although only one-fifth of attacks are reported to the police.

If you think that your runner’s speed and fitness will protect you against assault, you are giving someone out there a huge opportunity to hurt you.

To protect yourself, you must first get rid of that if-could-never-happen-to-me attitude, and then take the precautions that are necessary to protect yourself from violent crime. To find out how you can run safely, J.J. Bittenbinder, police inspector and safety lecturer, offers some tips.

After more than two decades of working with more than a thousand offenders, witnesses and victims of violent street crime, Bittenbinder has seen it all. And he has come up with some tough strategies to keep you safe on the streets. Indeed, what he has to say could save your life.

Q: Do women runners need to be constantly aware that they are potential victims?
A: I’d hate women to be scared every step of the way when running. You have to realize that bad things can happen to anybody, any place, and any time. But if you have a plan of action, you won’t have to concentrate on the fear. Every bad guy is different, but you have to be trained to do certain things and use certain skills if a bad situation comes up. Then your attitude changes – instead of being afraid, you say to yourself, “This stuff can happen, but I know how to prevent it.” You will be more self-assured and, believe me, that comes through in how you look and behave towards potential attackers.

Q: Is there anything that a woman can carry with her while she is running that she can use if someone threatens her?
A: Yes. You can try a personal alarm. And not only will it help you get out of a threatening situation, but just carrying it will make you feel tougher. And if you feel tough, you will look tough. And potential attackers will be more likely to leave you alone.

Q: Should runners carry money or identification?
A: Carry some coins in case you want to run to a phone box and call for help. And yes, carrying personal identification is a good idea.

Q: We tell runners not to wear headphones. Do you agree with this viewpoint?
A: Get rid of them. I really don’t like those things. They are a bit like wearing sunglasses in the dark. I appreciate that lots of people love them. In fact, I have had many women come up to me and say, “But I feel so confident when I am listening to my own music.” Well, that is because you are blocking out reality. You are in never-never land. When you wear those things, you may not have that extra 3- to 4-metre head start to break away at pace, and that factor could be the difference between making it or not – all because you couldn’t hear the potential attacker approaching.

Q: What time of day should women run?
A: Early-morning hours are the best because bad people are probably still in bed. We get a lot of reports of sexual assaults in the early evening, around 6 p.m.

Q: What if a stranger is approaching a woman – should she ignore him or acknowledge him?
A: When a man and woman approach each other, there comes a point when the woman looks away. And the reason she looks away is because, if she doesn’t she may encourage a comment from this man that she doesn’t especially want to hear. So she looks away – usually down.

But that is like saying, “I am weak”, or “I don’t want to be here”. I suggest that you wave your eyes across him once, but don’t look down straight after. Look to the other side or over his head. Remember, it is the one who looks the toughest who won’t get picked as a victim. Meeting someone’s gaze adds to a strong self-image, which is exactly what you want to project.

Q: Do you advise that women run with dogs?
A: Yes. A dog is an unknown thing to a potential attacker. He doesn’t know what the dog is capable of, and he doesn’t know about the intensity of the bond between dog and master. Just don’t call your dog Muffin or something like that when a suspicious character is around. I like Fang or Bandit a lot better.

Q: Where should women run? Are country roads safer than city streets?
A: The depths of the countryside are not the place to be. If a potential attacker looks both ways on a country road and it is empty, he knows there will be nobody to interrupt him. But a deserted city street doesn’t make things as easy – there could always be somebody looking out of a window or driving around a corner. Run where there are people and activities around you. And vary your routes and the exact time you exercise so that someone who notices you won’t be able to predict your whereabouts.

Q: Is there a profile of a potential attacker?
Note by KC: Now continue reading the earlier posting, if you want, which was a continuation from here.

Amby Burfoot’s (the Executive Editor, Runner’s World) Running Round-up

In addition to the good advice in the preceding paragraphs, women runners can do one more simple thing: they can run with a group. There is strength in numbers, after all, not to mention that it is a lot of fun.

All across the country, small (and sometimes large) groups of women get together for regularly scheduled runs. They meet in the early morning before daybreak and in the evening after the sun has set. They run together because it adds to their motivation (it is hard to miss a workout if others are waiting for you), because it becomes a social time, because it is easier to train hard with others and for dozens of other reasons unique to every group. Often, safety is the least of their concerns but an important payoff nonetheless.

If you can’t find a women’s running group, look to run with a male friend. It only takes one, and many women can run as fast as the men, so it is no problem keeping up. If you can’t keep up with the fast men, then run with them on their easy days when they run slowly. Look for running partners at work, with your running club or in your local area. If you have just one of two days a week when you have to run in the dark or in your local area where you don’t feel secure, you may be able to schedule escorted runs on those days.

A final (and regrettable) word about trail running: As trail running becomes more and more popular, increasing numbers of women find themselves drawn to it. And why not? It is hard to beat a relaxed run in a scenic, natural environment. Unfortunately, trail running raises a number of safety concerns, so don’t do it alone. Get together with a friend or friends to enjoy trail running as a group activity.

Women's Running: Advice That Could Save Your Life

Note by KC: The Runner’s World Book of Running was bought by Steven (aka Penguin-5; works in Hong Leong Bank). He was kind enough to lend his book to me. There is one chapter on women’s safety when running, and it is most appropriate to share with you.

The most thought-provoking idea was that a woman must never get into the car of an attacker. When you do, it is over. This sounds a resemblance with the few incidents that happened in Malaysia: First, the most recent case of Miss Choo Gaik Yap – she was raped and killed while jogging at around 6pm in Sungai Petani; second, Canny Ong’s, and third, a Chinese national girl student who took a taxi and was later raped and killed.

Text is extracted from the Runner’s World Book of Running

The safety question is the most troubling issue that women runners face. On the one hand, simply raising it restricts women runners. Instead of thinking of their workouts as a time of freedom and release when they can expand their horizons, they see limitations – the kind of shackles that women have long had to fight against. On the other hand, not to consider the safety question is sheer insanity.

At Runner’s World magazine, we encourage women to run by pointing out all the positive things about running. And we do this often and easily. After all, our women readers are constantly telling us about the many benefits that they have received. We get testimonials in the post nearly every day.

But we can’t stop there. Women have also been attacked, raped and murdered while running. Writers and editors can’t stop violence against women, but we can tell women how to be vigilant and how to protect themselves. That is the purpose of this chapter: to inform women runners while still liberating them.


Q: Is there a profile of potential attacker?
A: No. Because they look like you and me and your father and uncles and brothers and neighbours. Because that’s who they are. Don’t assume that someone dressed like a runner won’t pose a threat, either.

Q: So what do you do if a runner comes up alongside you and begins running with you?
A: It is all right to talk to him and run with him, if you want. Just don’t leave your normal running route. If he suggests going somewhere else, refuse.

On the other hand, if you feel scared right away because this guy is staring at your breasts or making crude remarks, you say, “Don’t talk like that. Leave me alone.” If he moves too close, use your personal alarm. (Note: Personal alarm will be discussed in Part 2 of the posting).

Q: What if you are being followed – should you confront the person and say, “Are you following me?”
A: No. Don’t ask questions. If you are suspicious, forget your normal route and take off for an area where there is more traffic or people. Never, ever ignore your instincts. When you feel the hair rise on the back of your neck, that is a few million year’s worth of evolution at work. Don’t ignore it – ever.

Q: What if somebody is trailing you in a car or stops to ask directions?
A: If anybody ever stops to ask, “Do you know …?” or “Have you got…?” or “Can you spare…?” just say, “No”. Don’t enter into a conversation. If he keeps it up, you should yell “No” again and “Leave me alone. Get out of here.” And believe me, you will be inspired to run away, even if you are at the end of your workout.

Q: What if someone grabs you? What can you do?
A: Flee if you can, but use the alarm if you can’t get away. If for some reason you have dropped it and he is trying to grab you, you have to use your legs to fight off the attack. Women don’t have the upper-body strength necessary to keep a man’s body off them. But you – especially runners – have the strength in your legs. If you get knocked down, start kicking hard.

Meanwhile, yell, but don’t yell for help. Too many people tune that out. You have to yell, “Fire! Fire! Fire!” and keep on kicking, yelling and using the alarm if you are able to. Don’t ever get on your knees during this struggle because he could get you in a choke hold, and then it is all over.

Q: Let’s make the scenario more threatening. What if someone is trying to force you into his car, and he has a knife or a gun? How should you react?
A: First of all, remember this: you must never get into a car. When you do, it is over. Many criminals use cars. And women whose bodies are found in woodland – they weren’t out there hiking in the woods when they were attacked. They were taken there in a car.

You must resist quickly. You must run away. If he gets hold of your jacket or shirt, you rip it off or pull it over your head and break away. Remember: the first few seconds of contact between a victim and offender are crucial – the offender has the least amount of control at that time because he is not sure how you are going to react. The more time you spend with him, the more he has got control.

Q: But what about the weapon – won’t you risk being hurt?
A: So what? It is better than getting in the car. Believe me, if you get in the car, you are dead. Just run. Say your assailant is brandishing a gun. If you run for it, you will have a 50 per cent chance of being hit. And if you are hit, you will have another 50 per cent chance of being seriously wounded and then another 50 per cent chance of being killed. Well, that is only 12.5 per cent of being killed. Pretty good odds compared to the car.

Q: Have you ever interviewed a runner who has been the victim of an attack?
A: No. but I heard recently about a woman who was running around a lake at dusk when she was attacked. Two young men slashed her. They weren’t trying to rob her because she had no money with her. They wanted to rape her, but she resisted, and they ran away. A taxi driver passing by saw her lying on the ground and took her to the hospital. She survived because she fought back.

Q: Unfortunately, rapes occurs. What does the victim need to know about reporting the crime?
A: the first thing you will want to do is to go to hospital. And I realize that this may be extremely difficult, but you must not bathe or clean yourself in any way. I know it is the first thing a woman instinctively believes she must do, but the fluids retrieved during the physical examination are what enable police to positively identify the offender through DNA analysis. And he will go to jail.

Q: How would you describe the woman runner who presents herself as a tough target?
A: She looks self-assured. Her head is up, and she looks straight ahead instead of down at her feet. She doesn’t wear headphones. She carries an alarm in her hand and she pays attention to everybody and everything, even cars that are traveling around her. If she hears somebody come up from behind, she makes a point of turning round to look at who it is. And if she is the least bit suspicious, she makes sure that the man sees the alarm in her hand so that he knows she could make things difficult for him.

Part 2: Other important questions in the next posting:
Do women runners need to be constantly aware that they are potential victims?
Is there anything that a woman can carry with her while she is running that she can use if someone threatens her?
Should runners carry money or identification?
We tell runners not to wear headphones. Do you agree with this viewpoint?
What time of day should women run?
What if a stranger is approaching a woman – should she ignore him or acknowledge him?
Do you advise that women run with dogs?

I Run, Therefore I am NUTS

I was lucky. I went to the Subang Jaya library wanted to borrow computer related books. I then spotted this book laying on the shelf. After a closer look, it says, “I Run, therefore I Am -- NUTS, by Bob Schwartz.” Hmmm, sounds interesting. Without hesitation, I borrowed the book.

The whole book is about funny experiences encountered by the author when running the various marathons. I would like to share with all runners some of the funny ideas extracted from this book. This book brings out the humor in situations that every type of runner can relate to:

On African Quotes
Every morning in Africa, a gazelle wakes up. It knows it must outrun the lion or it will be killed.
Every morning in Africa, a lion wakes up. It knows it must run faster than even the slowest gazelle, or it will starve.
It doesn’t matter whether you are a lion or gazelle -- when the sun comes up, you would better be RUNNING.

When the author’s wife first read this quote upon arising, she simply stated, “I live in the Midwest. Last I looked, there isn’t no lions or gazelles here. I am going downstairs preparing breakfast while you go ahead and figure out which African animal you are.”

Does Effort Bring Results?
We runners are often bombarded by motivational words seeking to make the meek [mild and patient] into the mighty. Or at least the snail into the gazelle. From Just Do It, to When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Goes Running. We are sold on the premise that effort breeds results.

Preparing for a Marathon
I was about to run a marathon in the heat of summer and I proceeded to drink water, water, water. My activities the day before the race were then confined to either standing in the bathroom or at the kitchen sink re-stocking my water bottles.

Runners’ Spouses
The spouses of runners also realize that sometimes the timing and destinations of vacations are planned solely around an accompanying race. Any form of sightseeing together is on hold until after the race. Saturday night’s meal won’t be at the famous five-star gourmet restaurant in the hotel, but at the all-you-can-eat pasta buffet dinner with free garlic bread at race headquarters.

Runners’ Shoes
Running spouses must also acknowledge that we runners are more concerned about rotating our excessive supply of running shoes than rotating the car tires; we own more waterproof running suits than business suits, and that half our wardrobe has reflective fabric for visibility in the dark.

E=MC Square
But we runners couldn’t care less about energy being equal to mass times the speed of light. We are more concerned with our lack of energy if our mass increases and produces the speed of fright.

Good and Bad News
The first mile marker arrived quickly and the split time provided me with good news and bad news. Good news was that I was 20 seconds ahead of my PR (personal record or personal best, PB) race. The bad news was that I was 20 seconds ahead of my PR best. Marathon anxiety had officially begun.

Traffic Junction
When you are cruising along with the euphoria of endorphins in full bloom, with no hint of fatigue and in no need or desire of a rest, the traffic signals will always be red at the intersection -- requiring you to stop your effortless pace.

Attack by Dog
When the large German shepherd down the street hops his fence and renews his desire to be my running partner by attempting to grasp onto my left thigh.

Hitting the Wall
I eventually appreciated the wall as something other than an album by Pink Floyd. [Note: Pink Floyd is a popular group of singers who produced a famous album called The Wall.]

Not So Scarlet Letters -- DNF
I always had a bite-the-bullet, grit-your-teeth and pound-your-chest approach to racing. I also recognized that there were going to be some race days when the powers that be would determine I had no power to be.

Note by KC: DNS – This is an acronym for Did Not Start. The situation is even worst than DNF (Did Not Finish). At least in DNF, a runner would have tried and is not able to achieve his objective of completing the race. DNS means the runner is never able to make it to the starting line. Of course, we use DNS for showing displeasure of circumstances which stands for “Dew Na Sing”... xx :-))

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Youth & the Year Ahead

2005 will soon draw to a close. It has been an eventful year for me participating in running, trekking and biking; I hope you have the same experiences too.

Moving forward, let us renew our commitment and enthusiasm to strive harder in outdoor quest and also in our career.

Wishing you a challenging and happy year ahead.

Below is my favourite inspirational passage and I would like to share it with you. It can really inspire and charge me up whenever I do not have the “oommp” in my endeavour; I hope it has the same profound effect on you too.

I first read this passage below in the September 1990 edition of Reader's Digest. I like it so much that I cut it out and keep it. After 15 years, on 2 January 2005, I decided to type into a softcopy document and share with my friends via emails. One of my friends was so touched and energized with the message that he replied excitedly: "YEAH...Let us die young at …". Then I realized that it was only the second day of 2005. It was really inappropriate for me sending the passage that provoked him to mention "die" at the start of a new year – did not sound auspicious. Nevertheless, I survive 2005 with much vigour.

So, I think it is appropriate to publish it at the end of the year.

Cheers,
KCxxx :-))



Youth

Youth is not a time of life; it is a state of mind; it is not a matter of rosy cheeks, red lips and supple knees; it is a matter of the will, a quality of the imagination, a vigor of the emotions; it is the freshness of the deep springs of life.

Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite, for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of 60 more than a boy of 20. Nobody grows old merely by a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals.

Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. Worry, fear, self-distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust.

Whether 60 or 16, there is in every human being’s heart the lure of wonder, the unfailing childlike appetite of what’s next and the joy of the game of living. In the center of your heart and my heart there is a wireless station: so long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer, courage and power from men and from the Infinite, so long are you young.

When the aerials are down, and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old, even at 20; but as long as your aerials are up, to catch waves of optimism, there is hope you may die young at 80. (From Reader’s Digest - September 1990)

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The Effect of Running Marathon

Note by KC: It is true that running in marathons has profound effects on every runner. Running a marathon is not about standing at the starting line and competes in that 42 km race. It is about commitment and constant training in order to cross the finishing line unscratched – without any injuries.

According to the training schedule which I am adhering to, I would have run 500km before I step foot at the marathon race if I were to follow the 3-month plan dutifully. The distance of 500km is equivalent to traveling from Kuala Lumpur to Kedah near the Thailand border!

The long hours of endurance training run actually generate tremendous chemical reaction in our bodies due to constant secretion of feel-good endorphin and super-charge adrenaline – good hormones for a lingering euphoria. Obviously, we are stronger in all aspects – physically and mentally. We would have lesser illness too due to stronger resistance in warding off virus attack.

One running friend told me that the duration for sex is also longer, much like endurance running. This could be bad new for the pharmaceutical company that produce Viagra pills. Another running friend has the most unusual discovery that the “brother” is also bigger due to the stimulation of hormones to certain organs of the body. Well, in order to testify both claims, we need more factual findings on those observations.


Below are excerpts from the book How to Run a Marathon
By Tony Benyon and Kevin Macey’s

Your Sex Life

Without a doubt running can alter your sex life drastically. The early days of training reduce you to a mound of aching jelly barely able to crawl unassisted upstairs let alone indulge in any nocturnal naughties. Quite naturally, this can cause distress in the marriage partner, speeding up an impending divorce.

Partners may jump to the conclusion you are tired because you have another lover or they may think you may have lost interest in them because running has turned you gay. After training for some while, many people find all they think about is sex, and running starts to make them hot for action, resulting in them speeding up the homeward half of their training route. Alas, the mind may be sexually rampant but the body isn't and they soon find they are falling asleep during love-making which is a step forward from falling asleep before it.

Don't be concerned; as time passes you will soon begin to feel the benefit from running. Your stamina will increase and so will the sensation of physical well-being. At last you will have the hots but be in top physical condition and so be able to do something about it. Alas, this is also the time when you realise you have no partner; they have long since lost interest and gone off with someone else.


Running Together

The couple who run together stay together as long as they both keep to the same schedule so their fantasies and capabilities coincide. If your partner misses a week's training, then so should you, otherwise you find your stamina is unequal to their fantasies.

Training together does have its problems. For example, running on a hot day in clothes that leave little to the imagination may give you an urge to lose yourselves in the long grass. Try to resist such temptations for the sake of your pulse rate and the laws of the land.

You will find that the experience of training together brings you closer to each other than ever before, not only sexually but mentally. You will be spending more time in each other's company and many more evenings at home. This is because you are both as boring as hell and no one wants to hang out with guys who just prattle on about running every waking moment. So make an effort to get out and about.

Go to parties and meet people but try to avoid the swapping parties, the nude cocktail parties and the 'Hey, let's all throw our car keys into the centre of the room' parties. Otherwise neither of you will have the strength left for training.

Your Social Life

The main effect running has on your social life is to make it vanish altogether. Without realising it, you can become a bore if all you want to do is talk about your P.B. (personal best), jogger's nipple and stabilizers. Even old friends will start to avoid you like the plague.

They will cross you off guest lists because you are always tired in the evening with the result that you are no longer invited out to dinner. No one wants a guest who falls asleep face down in the first course, or lies with his head on the table snoring during the coffee. It somewhat diminishes your reputation as a live wire and raconteur.

Running also leads to deterioration in your appearance, as you no longer get asked out you cease to buy new clothes. Instead, you shamble about wearing a track suit, muttering about health food and sneering at people who smoke.

More serious is the damage that can be done to your career. If you run to work or in the lunch hour no one wants to share an office with someone dripping with sweat and whose steaming feet burn holes into the carpet. Promotion will also elude you because the higher you climb in the business, the more often you are obliged to have long, large lunches and nights out with dignitaries. Falling asleep on them or scowling when they light their cigars are not attributes that will make you popular.


Becoming Thin

Marathon running is much talked about as being the ultimate challenge. For some people this may be true but for many others they only run to be thin, because fat is unhip. Looking thin is looking good, preferably with a suntan. Surplus mounds of white lard begin to vanish soon after taking up running, not only because exercise burns off unwanted calories but also through the worry caused by your marriage breaking up and your work prospects being wrecked.

Thinness also comes about because of a change in your eating habits. Now that you live on your own you tend to eat less because it really isn't much fun cooking for yourself. Restaurants are out too, as eating in them on your own isn't much fun and no one will eat in them with you.

Initially, you may find that running makes you hungry and so you eat more. But after a while you start to fit in eating around your training. The truth is you don't like returning to an empty home. So you stay out training for longer, which in turn means you have less time for eating. Even those rare couples still living together change their eating habits. They no longer have the huge meals they used to because they are too busy endlessly bonking.

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How to Train in Marathon

Yeah… to heighten the mood for Singapore International Marathon on 4 December, I have further extracted a few passages from the following book. This time, it is about “how to train” a marathon -- humorously.

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One thing for sure that the road from Bukit Aman en route to Sri Hartamas via the rich neighborhood of Bukit Tengku (Kenny Hills) is without any bars for drinking. It would be good, however, if any of the runner’s extra-marital lover's home is nearby so that we can just detour for some pit stops either to request for drinking water or to answer nature’s call – basic facility which is lacking along the running route.

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Though there are much more techniques that the book described, the following passages were written with lots of humour. Read on …


Extracted from the book How to Run a Marathon
By Tony Benyon and Kevin Macey’s

Practising Techniques

During a marathon you will need two main skills. Firstly you must know how to pick up a plastic beaker full of water and drink from it while running. And secondly you must always concentrate on running and not on what is going on around you. The former can be rehearsed with a friend who is prepared to be half drowned. The same good friend can also help you by pretending to be a television interviewer asking you banal questions while you are running. The best way to deal with such a nuisance is to maintain an icy stare ahead while driving a clenched fist into the interviewer's midriff.

The next problem will be coping with demonstrators who may try to block the path of the race for some political reason. Never sympathise with them or stop to sign a petition; just drive your knees forwards into their tenderest parts while stiffly elbowing them out of your way. Once again, you will need a friend to help you as it is almost impossible to rehearse this movement on your own.

Finally, you may experience insulting shouts of abuse from members of the crowd on race day. It is essential never to waste energy by losing your temper. Practise keeping your cool by having your friends shout insults at you. No doubt they will be eager to comply after the way you have just been treating them.


Training Routes

First-time runners should measure their initial training routes in time and not distance and preferably minutes not seconds. It is then possible to increase the time gradually until confidence builds to a point where the routes can be measured in miles. Several routes should be plotted to provide a mixture of short and long ones.

When plotting your routes remember you may be using them regularly. It is wise to avoid roads that take a considerable time to cross and, if you are an amply built young lady, it is advisable to avoid running past an open prison unless you don't blush.

The ideal route should avoid stopping and starting and such places as your favourite bar, restaurant or extra-marital lover's home. You should also by-pass people and shops to whom you owe money or think you may owe money to in the future; similarly the homes of ex-marriage partners, lovers and victims of crimes you have committed.

Try to run on open ground away from human habitation. If you are running through a nice suburban area or even a part of town where street crimes regularly take place, the police will immediately assume you are escaping from the scene of some illegal act and, after dragging you to the ground, they will take you to the police station in curls for questioning.''

Cars

Cars are almost as great a danger to runners as dogs. You may be harmlessly running along a pavement when suddenly the door of a parked car flies open causing you to crash into it. While you are lying on the ground counting stars, the owner of the vehicle will be frothing at the mouth demanding to know the name of your insurance company because the bone sticking out of your shoulder has scratched the paintwork.

Drunken drivers are the worst. They have the habit of pursuing you down country lanes and up grass embankments, all the while laughing like maniacs behind the wheel. They are also accurate shots with beer cans which they aim at your head. One of the sights they seem to enjoy most is of runners hurling themselves through plate glass windows in an attempt to escape.

Some running experts will tell you it is advisable to wear white or light clothing at night to make yourself easily seen by oncoming drivers. Beware! Light colours only make you a more identifiable target.

In addition to running you into the ground, drivers have another method for eliminating runners; it's called carbon monoxide. The deadly gas is pumped directly out of the car's exhaust straight into your lungs. A mask does offer some protection, but running along the street wearing a mask will cause you to be coshed to the ground by the police. Even worse, you may be chased by a police dog handler.


On Seeing God

Many people claim that on certain runs they have achieved a state of perfect bliss or ecstasy, and that on rare occasions they have been warmed by what can best be described as a spiritual or religious experience. Such statements have resulted in other people usually more at home with a joint taking up running. Their main hope is to reach a level of mind-blowing euphoria.

Such is the reason why many weirdos and loonies are attracted to running. It has been suggested by more serious runners that licenses should be provided for runners only after a psychiatric report gives them a clean bill of health. Others believe the damage is done after they have taken up running, because of the constant jogging and shaking the brain experiences.

However, there is little doubt a 'high' can be achieved by certain runners in the right circumstances. For example, when the mind and a physically perfect body reach a glorious balance, a sensation of being able to run and run forever hand in hand with God fills the runner's consciousness. Or when a very average runner happens to be running past a glue factory when it is on maximum production and the wind is in the right direction.

Next, the effect of marathon running on your SEX life and SOCIAL life.

In the Mood For Love

These few months leading to 4 December 2005, the Penguin Runners are busy training for the Singapore International Marathon (SIM) in the full marathon category. For runners who are also preparing for SIM, I presume all of us are in the mood for love of marathon.

When I ran my first full marathon in KLIM 2004, it was real fun preparing for the maiden attempt. I was nervous and did not know how much and how hard I should train. Luckily, PK Chan, a committee member of Pacesetters Club, was most kind to give me a copy of his training schedule.

Oh boy! I really followed the schedule dutifully: I ran almost every evening after work. In the months of November and December, these were the raining seasons. I even ran in the rain at night. Under the dimly lit streetlights, I was humming the song “walking (running) in the rain with the one I love” with only me and a stray dog hurriedly seeking for shelter.

It was a coincidence that months before that, I was reading a book on “How to Run a Marathon”. The book was written by Tony Benyon and Kevin Macey in 1986. This is the only book where I could complete reading it for three times. Usually, for other books that I bought or borrowed, I could hardly finish 10 pages before they were dumped at one corner of the house, citing insufficient time due to marathon training. Imagine I am still reading this book published 20 years ago!

I love to read this book because it was written with great sense of humour. The authors were able to work with words beautifully to the best effects. I have extracted a few pages of the book to share with you and hoping to spice up the marathon mood. Yeah, if you know where to buy the other books written by the same authors on running, appreciate it if you could let me know.

By KC

Contents below are extracted from the book: How to Run a Marathon
by Tony Benyon and Kevin Macey

INTRODUCTION

On the surface it would appear that running is one of the most natural things a human being can do and, like breathing, it is possible to do it for free. Nothing could be further from the truth. A price must be paid.

An acquaintance of mine entered the second London Marathon and trained for it for 50 weeks. Three quarters of the way through this period he was running in his local park deep in thought. His wife had finally left him the previous evening convinced he was having clandestine meetings with a lover while out training. Their deteriorating relationship had caused him to lose concentration at work and a junior colleague to be promoted over him.

This already sad man was suddenly dragged to the ground by three Alsatians. His life was saved only by the intervention of the owner. Staggering to his feet, his nerve snapped and he cursed the owner with every foul oath known to man, and after threatening to give him a good kicking he walked away promising to call the police.

Apologetically, the stranger informed him that he was a policeman. In fact, he was a police dog handler and the foaming creatures were also a bona fide part of the constabulary. Feeling crushed by fate, he retuned home with only his obsessive thoughts of the marathon to give him strength. Alas, two weeks before the race, a cyclist ran into him and broke his ankle. In his own philosophical words, “there is always a price to pay for having a good time”.


WHAT TO WEAR

SHOES

On entering a modern sports shop you will be amazed by the rows and rows of designer running shoes. Do not make the mistake of falling in love with the ones that match your eyes or the ones that make your heart beat faster because of some inexplicable chemical reaction between you.

Shoes that look wonderful but don't fit can be dangerous because they cause sores and blisters. And if they are too big and you have a high running action one could fly off and knock out a pedestrian's eye. Even worse, your shoe could fly through the open window of a passing truck and stun the driver causing him to crash into a supermarket killing hundreds of shoppers. Would you want this on your conscience?

The types of shoes on sale are incredibly varied; there are shoes fitted with stabilizers, computers, digital grips, graphic equalizers and countless other electronic gadgets. In the future when you put on your running shoes they will automatically sink hypodermic needles into your feet to place you in suspended animation while the shoes complete the race for you.

It is important to remember to buy your shoes in the afternoon because this is the time of day when your feet are at their largest. I'm not sure of the right time of day to buy jogging bra, but similarly you should try on both shoes because one foot is also larger than the other.

SOCKS

Runners sometimes elect to run in shoes without socks, but less frequently run in socks without shoes. The purpose of the sock is to offer the foot protection from those parts of the shoe that rub against it. But it is essential to keep your socks clean because if they get stiffened with dried sweat they can cause as much damage to your feet as shoes and also screw up your social life.

If you wear double-soled cotton or woollen socks but find you have to stop every two miles to squeeze out the excess moisture, then you should change to a synthetic material that dries out faster.

Sadly, socks have been known to break up marriages, and anyone cursed by particularly moist or pungent feet should remember to put their socks out at night, preferably in a sealed plastic bag. If you toss them out of the back door without sealing them up you will wake in the morning to find several stunned cats on your door step.

However, their pungency can work to your benefit. Horticulturists claim that some socks buried in a flower bed act as a superb deterrent to slugs.

The fashion of the moment is the short sock, but it is believed manufacturers will soon be bringing out the long sock which will offer the professional runner more room for carrying advertising.

SHORTS

Baggy knee-length shorts are a thing of the past. Today's thing is maximum leg exposure, shorts with thigh-high splits at the sides or even more recently, shorts that look increasingly like swimming trunks. Doubtless runners will soon appear on the streets in jock straps and G-strings; they will be luminous, of course, to help night drivers.

The ideal pair of shorts must not be tight around the waist but secure enough not to drop to the ground after the wearer has taken half a dozen strides. A runner without confidence in his or her shorts can suffer a spiralling anxiety effect which can increase the pulse rate alarmingly.

The material shorts are made of cannot be too light in weight. Hand-knitted shorts absorb moisture and will drop to the ground during heavy rain. Synthetic materials are lighter, less abrasive and dry more quickly. They also come in the most delightful colours which makes accessorising more fun and provides you with a better chance of matching your eyes.

Men mainly wear swimming trunks or a jock strap under their shorts while women prefer cotton briefs. As yet the boom in split crotch lace sporting panties has not materialised; which doesn't mean to say it won't.


VESTS

Wearing a string vest during the summer months will give you the appearance of a seasoned runner. Even more modern is the vest with the mesh midriff and the satin strip across the chest. Not only is it the poseur's delight but it also stops jogger's nipple while still allowing the navel to breathe.

Try to avoid wearing 'Sub Four Minute' vests while you are still at the staggering stage; even stray dogs will spot you as a fake. It is also advisable not to wear vests with such slogans as 'Marathon runners do it for hours on end' otherwise you will become instantly unpopular with the serious runners whom you may want to impress.

However, in these days of sponsorship it is quite acceptable to wear vests that carry some form of advertising extolling the virtues of a local garage or restaurant, but avoid any products that may encourage people to stop you in the street while you are running and ask you for brochures. Having your training runs interrupted is not beneficial.

Greengrocers' advertising should never be accepted. It can be a great embarrassment to a woman if she has to run through the streets with 'Ripe Melons' written across her chest or for a man to have 'Fresh Fruit' emblazoned across his; a training run can easily turn into a pursuit.

Next month, the effect of marathon running on your SEX life and SOCIAL life.